Louisville to Pigeon Forge

This morning we left our nice, comfy hotel in Louisville for a short drive to Lexington.  We were thinking about going to the Kentucky Horse Park, but it's pretty pricey for a group of people who are far more allergic to than they are interested in horses.  Fortuitously, we spotted the Old Friends Horse Retirement Farm, where thoroughbreds and other horses are sent as an alternative to the slaughterhouse, and it was free!  The setting was what you would see if you closed your eyes and visualized a Kentucky equestrian landscape.  Just perfectly beautiful, with separate pastures for each horse, since a lot of them are stallions.  We got in on a tour, walking around with a leisurely group, listening to a woman tell each horse's story, feeding each one carrots and starlight mints (!) out of our hands.  I didn't even know horses liked mints!

 Everyone running into the barn.  The injured horses that were in there were not happy and were making a lot of "Hey!  Lemme go outside!" noises.

 One of the horse's names.

 You know how some people are really in tune with animals' personalities, and sometimes you think those people are nuts?  Well, these horses had just BLATANT personalities, there was no denying it.  Some were highly affected, some were a little cranky, some were prima donnas, but all of them were obviously highly intelligent and very, very interactive.  If you're an alien looking for intelligent life on this planet, you might want to start at the Old Friends farm, with the four-legged athletes.  I'm convinced their forms of communication are more sophisticated than ours, and they are far more graceful than we are, too.

Everyone's favorite horse was a tiny, shaggy thing that looked to me like a very short, stout Shetland pony, but the woman said it wasn't a pony, it was a mini horse.  She said the farm owner liked to take the mini to town on a leash and sit with it at a cafe, where it - the horse - would enjoy a glass of Chardonnay.  This same mini horse would watch the Kentucky Derby on TV, inside the house!

Our day was full of delightful coincidences, the next one being that we saw the original Kentucky Fried Chicken restarant and museum at just the right time to dodge off the freeway.  Xanthe cried because she didn't know if she would like the food, until I realized that they didn't know what KFC stands for!  They were excited to see that "Kentucky Fried Chicken" looked very familiar.  The place was great, and I was happy to see that it wasn't a touristy ripoff.  Good prices, understated atmosphere.

In other words, the opposite of the Gatlinburg area of Tennessee.  But, I'm ahead of myself.  Our last stop of the day was the Museum of Appalachia, featuring various log cabins, farm structures, goats, sheep and a gift shop.  We didn't pay for the tour, which was like $8 a person, because we saw plenty with just petting the goats and walking around the grounds and gift shop, where the kids bought hard tack candy.  I have never been to Tennessee, so it was a thrill to drive up and down those deeply wooded hills.  How beautiful!  We're out of the Midwest, the rolling corn fields and well-kept farms.  Now it's lush, green, forested hills.  The verdure is almost overwhelming.  Strangely, I felt a bit claustrophobic with every inch being covered with green growth that seemed to be unstoppable.  I guess there is desert in my soul.  I had the strange sensation of wanting to see what was under all that vegetation.  Rocks?  Dirt?  What are you hiding, Tennessee?  Why all the trees?

 I loved this Appalachian art.  I wish I had bought this guy.

I told the kids to look exhausted and poor for this picture, taken at the Museum of Appalachia.  I think they did a good job!  It makes me laugh.


So, Gatlinburg.  Actually, we're in Pigeon Forge.  We got to our hotel and were excited to see that the pool had a slide!  I would have been all for staying in and relaxing, but this is the world's capital of DOING stuff.  There are all these huge monuments to fun, from mini golf, lazer tag and go karts to dinner theater and magic shows.  It's like Las Vegas had an illegitimate Appalachian child and it turned out to be Gatlinburg. 

We went out and got ice cream and were getting caught up in the fever of doing, doing, doing, when I decided to dial it back.  We didn't need to see a giant aquarium or a 10-acre ropes course, or go up in a hot air balloon.  We needed to go to our hotel and swim in the lovely pool and bring pizza to our room, so that's what we did.  It was perfect, although now we'll probably never get to play indoor black-light mini golf.  Tziporah convinced me to take her down the waterslide, and once she did it, she was hooked.  She never minded going under water at the bottom, and she learned a new word:  "'gain!"

Speaking of new words, whenever Tizzy sees food, she starts saying, "A-donawds!  A-doawlds!"  We figured out she is saying McDonald's!  So funny to see her pointing to the eggs at breakfast and saying longingly, "A-donawds!"

And the new word that has had me cracking up for two days:  When we were wandering through Nashville, Indiana, I saw Ptolemy going toward the road, so I called out to him, "Tamale!  Wait!"

Yes, I called my son tamale.  Whenever I think about it, I have to stop and cross my legs because it cracks me up every time.  Tamale!  Wait!  I can't believe my kids don't think it's funny like I do.

These posts are long, but like someone famous said, "I will write a long letter because I don't have time to write a short one."  No time to edit, it's late in Tennessee, and I think I'll go see the moon before I sleep.  To know it's the same moon shining on Scott, Golda and Ruby is a comfort.  We all miss them, but we're having so. much. fun!