This one is tongue-in-cheek for my fellow Latter-day Saints. My dad gave a wonderful talk today in Sacrament meeting that didn't follow this outline at all. It was a brilliant talk about his ancestors and others who sacrificed everything for their faith. My dad was inspiring. I'm just facetious. But maybe the Mormons will think I'm funny. Here's fill-in-the-blank talk for you, in case you ever have to speak in church on short notice. Hey, if we can't laugh at ourselves, who will?
Fill-in-the-Blank Sacrament Meeting Talk
Good morning – er – afternoon, brothers and sisters. When the bishop called me to speak, I thought____________________________________________.
I really enjoyed that wonderful musical number. I wish it could have gone on forever! But no, really, I am glad to be here today. Just bear with me because_____________________________________.
The topic I have been assigned today is________. This word appears ___
times in the standard works. That shows you just how important it is. In fact,_____ percent of all the sections of the D & C contain this word.
Webster's defines this word as__________________________________
__________.
In a 1987 General Conference talk, Elder _______R.________ stated the following, quote,_________________________________ end quote.
Forgive me for reading so much, but_________________________________.
If we look in the Book of Mormon, it reads…bear with me… (find scripture and struggle through 3 or 4 verses). As I was thinking about that scripture this morning when I was preparing my talk ( chuckle), I was struck by_________________________
______________________________________________.
When I was on my mission, I met a woman named Maria. She had a challenge with___________. We told her________________________, and she ended up getting baptized a week later. (Look at clock)
Um…I have another story here from the 2005 Ensign that I’d like to read.____
________________________________________________________________
I had some other stories I was going to read, but it looks like we’re out of time. I hope we can all__________________________________________________I know I can do better in this area. In the name of ….
Good morning – er – afternoon, brothers and sisters. When the bishop called me to speak, I thought____________________________________________.
I really enjoyed that wonderful musical number. I wish it could have gone on forever! But no, really, I am glad to be here today. Just bear with me because_____________________________________.
The topic I have been assigned today is________. This word appears ___
times in the standard works. That shows you just how important it is. In fact,_____ percent of all the sections of the D & C contain this word.
Webster's defines this word as__________________________________
__________.
In a 1987 General Conference talk, Elder _______R.________ stated the following, quote,_________________________________ end quote.
Forgive me for reading so much, but_________________________________.
If we look in the Book of Mormon, it reads…bear with me… (find scripture and struggle through 3 or 4 verses). As I was thinking about that scripture this morning when I was preparing my talk ( chuckle), I was struck by_________________________
______________________________________________.
When I was on my mission, I met a woman named Maria. She had a challenge with___________. We told her________________________, and she ended up getting baptized a week later. (Look at clock)
Um…I have another story here from the 2005 Ensign that I’d like to read.____
________________________________________________________________
I had some other stories I was going to read, but it looks like we’re out of time. I hope we can all__________________________________________________I know I can do better in this area. In the name of ….
I'm not trying to be sacrilegious. Just finding my culture funny!
8 comments:
So sad but OH SO TRUE! We are little creatures of habit and repetion, aren't we? :)
trying to be funny, and succeeding! Sad, but true!
That is funny, Circe. What is really scary, is when your teenager stands up to give a talk in Sacrament meeting, and you have no idea what the paper he is holding says, (if anything)... you kind of WISH he had a fill-in-the- blank talk. Just wait... you will see what I mean soon enough!
Yep, gave that one last week.
Hi, I'm new to your blog, and I have to laugh! "Elder _____R._____" Hee Hee
My Husband is a Bishop and HATES it when members say stuff like, "When the Bishopbric member called me Wednesday . . ." Empahsizing how little time they had to prepare and unintentionally telling the ward the bishopbric must be pretty unorganized.
Too many talks just like that.. it's almost hard to laugh... what we do is try so hard not to SNORE!
Circe - thanks for the comment on my blog. I found you through Gingham World. I hope you don't mind that I stopped by!
Circe - Angie and I think that you should go into business marketing inspiring messages and talks for all. We laughed so hard. I haven't been to church in years and find it fascinating that things sound pretty much the same. Just like Days of Our Lives 20 years later. Thanks for the good laugh, Kim and Angie Pierson
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