What Ails You?

My kids are falling apart.  Every time I turn around, someone is asking for a band-aid, and we don't have any because when we do, the kids use them up as fast as they can.  Ari had to come up with a new design for her tights to compensate for a big scrape on her knee.  Freestone has had pain in his foot, then his knee, then his hip and his elbow.  And Ptolemy, I can't tell if he's just copying or if he has the same symptoms.  When he runs out of things to say, he says, "Ow!  My knee!  I need a band-aid!"

It's gotten so bad that Ari and Freestone tearfully confronted me about my callousness.  "You don't even care about us one bit," they cried.  "You don't care if we're hurt.  You won't even buy band-aids!"  Their sad little faces almost softened my heart, but I answered, "You're right.  I don't care that you're hurt because I can't do anything about it, but I do care if you practice and do your homework, so you'd better do that right now."  Gee, maybe I am mean.  Especially since practicing seems to make Freestone's hip hurt worse.  And Ari has spent a large part of her reading time patting her knee with alcohol-soaked rags.  And now she thinks she has an "overgrown toenail."  I must say, it does look suspicious.

Freestone cried so much this morning as he valiantly tried to make it down the stairs to get dressed that I promised him I'd call the doctor.  Is there anything legitimate he could possible have?  What am I going to say to the doctor?  "His hip hurts when he has to practice, homework makes him start limping and his elbow aches every time I ask him to get dressed.  Oh, and I think it's contagious because his baby brother has it too, now.  The only thing that seems to help is going to Pack Meeting, but only if there are s'mores.  Can you help us, doctor?"