Parameters

 Maybe I'm just being a baby. This morning, Freestone had some homework to do. The assignment was cutting and gluing squares; something to do with math. I'm sure he understood the assignment at school, but at home, he didn't think he had enough squares and I couldn't help him because there were no instructions. On top of that, there was last week's reading log that he didn't do, and the prospect of being kept in from recess because of it. And there was the regular homework, French and English, and the Monday folder to be signed, and the daily binder to be signed, and this week's reading log, and it was P. E. and he needed the right shoes, and...

 When it was time to go, Freestone just laid down on the floor and sobbed. This is a kid who pines away all summer for school. He loves it. School is a place where Free has always felt successful, but last week we had a similar breakdown when it was Sunday night and he had a huge hero packet to finish, as well as the carving of an applehead witch, involving detailed instructions.

 Part of it is a new learning curve, figuring out a better way to organize his time. But part of it is, it's just too much. I'm finding myself increasingly impatient with the school for encroaching on my time. Freestone came home today and went straight to his room. I gave him some time while I helped Xanthe practice piano, drove some kids around and supervised part of Ari's practicing. Then I went downstairs, expecting to have to pry Freestone away from Minecraft or something. Instead, he was reading a book. He was hiding in his room, stealing time for reading. It almost makes me want to cry. I tidied up his room, and let him read. It won't be without a price, though. Homework is still hanging over his head, as well as all the things Scott and I want him to do and learn, like violin and putting away his laundry.

 This morning, while Freestone was choking on his tears, I emailed the teacher and explained the frustration over the instructionless homework. I said, "Our family only has a finite amount of time that I allow the children to do homework, as we have other things to do as well." I have emailed the other teachers expressing the same sentiment, over the course of the past few days. It's my new policy. I will let the kids spend the 60 or 70 homework minutes that are in the guidelines, and then I will go over any remaining work with my child, filling in the answers for him or her, explaining it as we go along. I will also explain to my kids that, in our family, we make sure we have parameters around homework, so that we also have time for other things that are important for us. I really feel like I have to take back our family from all the pressures. Just because the norm in our neighborhood is that the kids have this crushing amount of homework, doesn't mean that I can't act on my own instincts. It's a balance, and I want some of my children's time back. Sometimes I wonder if it would be a better childhood if we lived on a sailboat and my kids were dreadlocked and barefoot. I bet they could get into Harvard on the strength of that kind of a lifestyle! All they'd need is a killer essay about how the world was their classroom.