Little Tizzy

This little baby is almost four months old!  Time goes so fast, I'll never be able to get enough of her chubby chuckles or the smell of her velvety-soft head.  I still can't believe we have Tziporah!  I often think back to the moment I saw the positive pregnancy test.  I was positive it was going to be negative.  Ha!  I didn't even have time to walk away from it before the two lines registered.  I guess my first reaction was a mixture of rapture, joy and disbelief.  And then a pervading fear rushed in, that something could happen to the baby.  Miracles aren't so easy to come by, and can be so delicate.  Five, ten seconds after I learned of the existence of this baby, I would have been devastated to lose her.  I would have missed her for the rest of my life.

The night before Freestone's baptism, when I was nine or ten weeks along, I spotted.  I thought, "Not now!  Why!?"  I was heartbroken.  I couldn't sleep all night and prayed continually to be able to keep the baby here with us.  The next morning, everything was fine.  My prayers were answered.  That was a comfort to me throughout the rest of the pregnancy, even when she mysteriously stopped growing.  I kept telling myself that this baby's mission was to stay here, but it was hard to believe we could be so fortunate, so blessed.  I couldn't hold her in my arms a moment too soon.

Tziporah is a complete, complex, intricate person in that tiny little body, just bursting to fulfill her destiny.  She is at the beginning of a journey I can't even imagine, as she lays nestled in her birdie sleeper, her small hands tucked up under her chin.  The rest of us, we're just lucky to be along for the ride.