I guess I love to throw a party. I got it from my mother. The opera guild party she hosted where she made upholstery for our patio furniture and clothing to match for her children is legendary. She goes a little nutso with the party planning.
I love to host, but I'm not OCD enough to pull off details like the kids matching the patio furniture, or the napkins being a specific shade of chartreuse, or even necessarily being home when the party starts. Whenever I set out to have a party, I do have visions of color-coordinated perfection. I allow those visions to inspire me, but I don't hold myself to them, because that's just setting myself up for failure. Those parties you see in magazines, they are expensive. Normal people don't have eight hundred strands of twinkle lights or a thousand bucks worth of out-of-season tulips at their disposal, let alone a dozen round tables with vintage cloths. Although, if anyone has access to round tabletops, it's the Mormons, so I guess I do have some advantages. Any Latter-day Saint in any corner of the world could pull off a wedding, a natural disaster triage center, dinner for six hundred or all three at once, with 24 hours' notice and a couple of phone calls.
But...for everyday life, I like to do a party, but I don't shoot for a Versailles-circa-1714 vibe. Guests have a lot more fun when the hostess isn't stressing about details. I thought I'd throw some of my ideas out there and see if "you guys" have any to add. Here they are:
*Over-Invite. At least a third probably won't come, and unless it's a group of very close friends, a small party can be awkward. Specify a start time and an end time. People are busy, so I like to imply that they can just stop by during the time frame, or feel free to stay the whole time.
*Get inspired. Choose a color, thing, place, book, song or idea to be the inspiration. It makes it easier and more fun to pull everything together if you're looking for something specific. Unless you, like me, chose a panda theme before Kung Fu Panda came out. There were no panda party supplies anywhere in 2005!
*Use what you have. Choose something you love that you already have for the inspiration, like fruit you've bottled yourself for centerpieces, or books you love for decorations. Flowers from your yard...relevant photos...
*Accept help. I always put RSVP on the invitations, but very few people actually do. If someone calls to say they're coming, and what can they bring, give them an assignment. Have some things ready beforehand that you can delegate. People feel bad when you reject their offers to help.
*Clean ahead, then stop. Decide a week in advance what you want the venue to look like, and make a plan to get it there. You do not want to be cleaning non-stop the day of the party. Then, when things are looking good, walk away. I always try to schedule a few hours away with the kids the day of a party. We get our chores done, then we leave. You can lose your perspective when you cook and clean all day. And if you stay away too long, there is always the option of ditching everything in your closet instead of cleaning it up, which I highly recommend. Not that I would ever do that.
*Break out the good dishes...even if one breaks. Why have them if I can't use them for people? If you never pull out your good stuff, get rid of it and stock your cupboards with nice paper plates so you're always ready to entertain.
*Food...fun, filling, beautiful, sweet, savory and new. The reason you're having a party is to have fun, so have fun. Never a nut cup and a mint. No, no. It's not 1970. And I think the food should be ready to go when the party starts. Why torture people?
*Have two parties. Why not? After the first one, the house is clean, you've made food, you might have leftover party supplies, the balloons are still inflated and the flowers are still fresh. Invite a little group over for lunch the day after an evening party, or have friends over Saturday night, family Sunday, same menu. Two birds, one stone.
*Don't worry! If I choose to host a party, it is my responsibility to manage the stress. I want my kids to understand that I love having people over; their friends, my friends...life is a celebration. If it's a celebration with dusty blinds or guests arrive before I do, oh well. I'm not going to freak out over something I chose to do.
*Have fun with it. There are tons of ideas on Pinterest, etc. Let your creative side take over. And if entertaining isn't fun for you, just don't do it and don't worry about it. Or, do it a whole bunch. Just have one shindig after another until you feel like you have it down and you can have people over without getting stressed about it. Practice makes...easier? It's worth a try, and you could end up with some fun memories, even if it turns out entertaining isn't for you after all.
Now I want to hear your ideas for easy fun, so that I can steal them for my next event!
I love to host, but I'm not OCD enough to pull off details like the kids matching the patio furniture, or the napkins being a specific shade of chartreuse, or even necessarily being home when the party starts. Whenever I set out to have a party, I do have visions of color-coordinated perfection. I allow those visions to inspire me, but I don't hold myself to them, because that's just setting myself up for failure. Those parties you see in magazines, they are expensive. Normal people don't have eight hundred strands of twinkle lights or a thousand bucks worth of out-of-season tulips at their disposal, let alone a dozen round tables with vintage cloths. Although, if anyone has access to round tabletops, it's the Mormons, so I guess I do have some advantages. Any Latter-day Saint in any corner of the world could pull off a wedding, a natural disaster triage center, dinner for six hundred or all three at once, with 24 hours' notice and a couple of phone calls.
But...for everyday life, I like to do a party, but I don't shoot for a Versailles-circa-1714 vibe. Guests have a lot more fun when the hostess isn't stressing about details. I thought I'd throw some of my ideas out there and see if "you guys" have any to add. Here they are:
*Over-Invite. At least a third probably won't come, and unless it's a group of very close friends, a small party can be awkward. Specify a start time and an end time. People are busy, so I like to imply that they can just stop by during the time frame, or feel free to stay the whole time.
*Get inspired. Choose a color, thing, place, book, song or idea to be the inspiration. It makes it easier and more fun to pull everything together if you're looking for something specific. Unless you, like me, chose a panda theme before Kung Fu Panda came out. There were no panda party supplies anywhere in 2005!
*Use what you have. Choose something you love that you already have for the inspiration, like fruit you've bottled yourself for centerpieces, or books you love for decorations. Flowers from your yard...relevant photos...
*Accept help. I always put RSVP on the invitations, but very few people actually do. If someone calls to say they're coming, and what can they bring, give them an assignment. Have some things ready beforehand that you can delegate. People feel bad when you reject their offers to help.
*Clean ahead, then stop. Decide a week in advance what you want the venue to look like, and make a plan to get it there. You do not want to be cleaning non-stop the day of the party. Then, when things are looking good, walk away. I always try to schedule a few hours away with the kids the day of a party. We get our chores done, then we leave. You can lose your perspective when you cook and clean all day. And if you stay away too long, there is always the option of ditching everything in your closet instead of cleaning it up, which I highly recommend. Not that I would ever do that.
*Break out the good dishes...even if one breaks. Why have them if I can't use them for people? If you never pull out your good stuff, get rid of it and stock your cupboards with nice paper plates so you're always ready to entertain.
*Food...fun, filling, beautiful, sweet, savory and new. The reason you're having a party is to have fun, so have fun. Never a nut cup and a mint. No, no. It's not 1970. And I think the food should be ready to go when the party starts. Why torture people?
*Have two parties. Why not? After the first one, the house is clean, you've made food, you might have leftover party supplies, the balloons are still inflated and the flowers are still fresh. Invite a little group over for lunch the day after an evening party, or have friends over Saturday night, family Sunday, same menu. Two birds, one stone.
*Don't worry! If I choose to host a party, it is my responsibility to manage the stress. I want my kids to understand that I love having people over; their friends, my friends...life is a celebration. If it's a celebration with dusty blinds or guests arrive before I do, oh well. I'm not going to freak out over something I chose to do.
*Have fun with it. There are tons of ideas on Pinterest, etc. Let your creative side take over. And if entertaining isn't fun for you, just don't do it and don't worry about it. Or, do it a whole bunch. Just have one shindig after another until you feel like you have it down and you can have people over without getting stressed about it. Practice makes...easier? It's worth a try, and you could end up with some fun memories, even if it turns out entertaining isn't for you after all.
Now I want to hear your ideas for easy fun, so that I can steal them for my next event!
2 comments:
I love planning parties too! And so does my mom and sisters. It must run in the family. Maybe we got it from going to Nana's party each Sunday. I agree with all your ideas, especially fresh flowers!
I don't have any tips, because I'd rather fall over dead than throw one! It gives me complete anxiety...how people like you do it is simply mind boggling to me...you are AMAZING PEOPLE! However, when I think about your tip of cleaning, then leaving it be, it makes it seem much less agonizing because that is my problem. I can clean and clean and still find things that aren't just perfect, and then I can't even enjoy myself at the get together.
Love your tricks...thank you for sharing...maybe someday I will find the courage to put something together!
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