Heads Up! Seven Up! Update

Seven's up.  The seventh child in our family.  I know, you're thinking, "But I thought..."  Yeah, that's what we thought too.

OK, I accidentally published that as I was walking out the door to church and just noticed it.  Oops!  It sounded like we weren't excited, but we are.  I wasn't finished!!

Later, when it's not late at night, I'll tell you all about how I always felt like somebody was still missing after Ptolemy was born and about how we were 99.9% sure we could never have another baby and how it would have been crazy to try at 40, so we didn't.  And really, when is SIX kids not enough??  When the Lord gives you seven, that's when.  We are thrilled and terrified and have the general sense that we're on the uphill climb of a never-ending roller coaster.  But we can't wait to meet this extraordinary spirit.  We feel her or his spirit so strongly already, it seems to just make sense that this baby is coming to our family.  I can't tell you how profoundly grateful I feel.

Musical Waterslides

 Freestone loves orchestra!!!

 Evil eye

 Ari in her pirate garb

 Tolly sneaking up onstage

 "Mom, why are you torturing me?"

 "Don't you love me?"

 Araceli and Freestone finished up their summer orchestra program with two fun concerts, one at the Ed Kenley amphitheater, attended by all the grandparents, and one at Cherry Hill, attended by all of our cousins and friends who wanted to spend the day with us doing waterslides.  I love all these pictures where Freestone is giving me the evil eye.  I think he experienced new levels of misery enduring this experience.  The group played Pirates of the Carribbean and Spirit of the American West, which, I admit, were way over Freestone's head.  I thought he did an admirable job of faking, though, which is a very valuable orchestra skill.  Too bad Freestone wants a valuable orchestra skill about as much as he wants his very own copy of "The Compleat Works of William Shakespeare."

Nevertheless, Freestone survived, Araceli was a pro and did a great job and they both got their FREE pass to Cherry Hill!  And look how much fun we had!  We were at Cherry Hill from 9:45 in the morning to 8:30 that night when we reluctantly left with the last of the crowd.  I left the kids to procure two meals to eat in our shady corner of the water park, but other than that, we were doing slides and pools the whole time.  I went through a whole bottle of sunscreen.   Ptolemy quite enjoyed himself, from what I could tell.  Every time I took him down the waterslide, he acted calmly indifferent like, "Uh-huh.  OK, a waterslide.  Whee?"  We drifted in the Lazy River for hours.  He loved it all just as much as the other kids, and so did I.  I wish we could go back today and every day.  I'm thinking of asking Santa for passes for next summer.  The best part, now that my kids are great swimmers, is that I could drop them off and pick them up later, and they could stay entertained and cool for hours at a time, while being outdoors and getting exercise.  Win, win, win!  Except that I might want to stay and do the waterslides, too.  Cherry Hill takes me right back to my childhood, and that's a good feeling.

As much as Freestone claimed to have hated every minute of orchestra, I love that he stuck with it.  I heard him singing Spirit of the American West in the shower last night, and I had to smile.  He may never play Carnegie Hall, but slowly, against his will, he is being enriched.  Ari's sweet friend Emma said to me after the concert yesterday, "Your family loves music."  It was such a simple validation of all my efforts, I wanted to give Emma a hug.  We love music and we love waterslides.  I wonder if there's a way to combine the two?  If there is, Freestone will probably figure it out.

A Liar Is Born

"Woobee did it!"

Angels and Demonic Fireworks

 "I love this one!"

 Britton

I am so thankful for our pioneer ancestors who sacrificed everything to come to the Salt Lake Valley so that their descendants could risk their lives putting on aerial firework shows in their front yards.  Our show featured plenty of danger, screaming, running for cover, burning clothing and a torrent of rain.  I don't know whether our hearty, stoic ancestors would have been horrified or impressed.

Everything was fine while we went through the snakes, then the smoke bombs and on to the fountains.  There was a major fireworks display happening right behind ours, one street over.  Their aerials provided a stunning backdrop to our little fountains.  Then it was our turn to pull out the big guns.  The first one launched a shell straight up into the sky.  It exploded right above our heads.  Scott shouted, "I can't believe they sell these things!"  Then something went wrong and the next shell shot straight into the vacant field next door.  In the confusion, we were stunned when the next rockets came straight for us!  Michelle said her brain shifted from, "Hey, we're lighting the field on fire" to, "Hey, we're lighting the KIDS on fire.  Run!"  It was like a 3-D movie, with burning asteroids coming straight at your face.  One got Lexie right in the chest and burned her shirt.  I held Ptolemy and covered his face as the older kids ran screaming for cover.  By some miracle, nobody was hurt.

The next aerial firework was spectacular.  (Can you believe we dared try another one?)  This time, a series of explosions went off in the sky, where they belong.  They were so close, it was as terrifying as it was thrilling.  I was looking straight up, screaming with every blast as sparks rained down.  When it ended, I looked around.  There was not a kid in sight.  They had all scattered to any hiding place they could find.  Then the actual rain started.  It pelted down as we looked up to see the fireworks, streaming sparks and raindrops falling down.  By this time, the kids were literally shell-shocked and didn't enjoy the several neighbors' shows that were going on all around us, nor did they want to hold sparklers.  Some of them just stood there holding the sparkler at arm's length and screaming, "Take it away!  Take it away!"

Meanwhile, the sky was bursting with color in two directions.  It was spectacular.  Amid the pyrotechnics, somebody found a little Sherman tank that we forgot to light.  As the blazing sky recalled "the rockets' red glare, the bombs bursting in air," the little tank struggled across the road emitting sparks, coming to a stop and popping out a tiny American flag.  It was like the little tank was saying, "Look at me!  Look what I can do!  I have a flag!"  Alas, the poor little tank was upstaged.

After the adrenaline subsided, Freestone declared, "That was the worst fireworks show ever.  But the one that attacked us was awesome!"   

When the "attack" happened, our little ones must have been protected by angels.  Maybe it was our pioneer ancestors.  From now on, we should try to honor their sacrifices in a different, safer way so that they don't have to spend their post-mortal existence jumping in front of flaming balls of gunpowder.

Attention, Organizers

All you people-movers, carpoolers and family event planners, I need advice.  I have used the engagement calendar system since I was in 7th grade.  The past few years, I've had the perfect planner:  the Audubon Society calendar.  I like everything about it - the gorgeous photography, the clean format, the size.  I send a check every July to an address in Manhattan and I get the next year's book.  But I went to Barnes and Noble with Golda and Ruby to let them choose their own calendars, and I saw other planners that I liked.  One in particular organized each day vertically which seems like a good idea, so I could have morning things at the top of the page and go down chronologically. But should I change a system that works?  I just feel like I have to amp up the planning as the kids get older and more involved.  I want all the kids to feel organized and in control so they can learn to "use their time wisely," as Jackson would say.  :)  I feel like I need a command and control center with 20 foot high screens, radar that tracks each kid, chairs that swivel and alarms that go off when it's time to take someone to a lesson.  Is that too "Disney Movie?"  Overkill?

What I want to know is, what works for you?  I think I might have to get one of those giant wall calendars and list each child's activities for everyone to see, but I still need my little calendar with me all the time.  I know you all have systems.  Lay it on me!  How do you keep it all straight?  Last year, it took me a month before I stopped dropping Ari off at ballet on Mondays.  Her class was Wednesday-Saturday, while Golda's was Monday-Wednesday-Friday, and I could not remember that!  I don't have room to write details about each ballet class, since there are 15-20 a week, so I just write the times.  "4:00" means someone has ballet at 4:00.  You'd think I could remember who.  My other problem is pens.  Lefties have problems with writing utensils, and Sharpies work really well for me.  I think they might bleed through the page with some planners, though.

Do you color-code?
Do you post the calendar for the whole family to look at?
Do you write down who drives and who babysits with different activities?
How is your calendar formatted?  Vertical?  Horizontal?  Hourly?  A month at a time doesn't work for me because the squares are too small, but it might work for a big family calendar.

Tell me how you keep it all straight.  Include homework and practicing times, chores, meals, special events, double bookings and lessons.  I am boycotting carpools this year because I can't keep them all straight.  I'll let you know how that works.  I do love to drive the kids, so I feel good about it, and I like not having anyone else relying on me...just in case I forget what "4:00" means.

My Two Sons

 Friday

 Whenever Tolly sees an animal - a horse or a deer - he says, "EH-phant!"

 Saturday

Ptolemy "helping."

Xanthe has been telling everyone she sees that she is going out of town and won't be here because she will be at the cabin on a daddy-daughter trip.  It's true, Scott, Ryan and Jeremy took their girls to the cabin for the weekend to spend some time with grandpa and each other.  That left me with my two boys, a '95 Cadillac de Ville and limitless possibilities for the whole weekend.  Friday after the girls left, we went and collected our free fireworks.  Scott's office lets the nearby firework stand advertise on their property, and in exchange, they give us a big box of fireworks.  Freestone walked around with the firework woman and chose his favorites.  He was in HEAVEN!  We could have ended our weekend right there and he would have thought it was a success.

But the fun continued!  The boys and I got ice cream cones, drove through Panda and Redbox and went home for an evening of movies and take-out.  Guess what?  Movies are a lot more relaxing when you don't have a half-dozen kids commentating.  I even stayed up late and watched my own movie after the boys went to sleep, which never happens when you have teens at home who don't go to bed.

Saturday morning, we arrived at the Bowman's breakfast early.  Bill walked down and met us, and then we were off to the zoo.  We're used to the zoo on winter weekdays when nobody else is there.  This time, the crowds were wild!  We did a lap around the place, hit the elephants, the greenhouse and Grandmother's House in the Asian Highlands, and we were outta there.  We loved the new dinosaurs that follow you with their eyes, roar and spray water.  The zoo always makes me feel like I'm on vacation.

A weekend fling has to include junk food, so we hit McDonald's for Freestone's favorite, a "McDouble plain," and spent the afternoon napping (Pt), playing video games (Free) and reorganizing Ari's room and closets and doing laundry (me).  I had all but forgotten what is was like to get something done without a million interruptions.  Around what would have been bedtime, it was so beautiful outside that I threw the boys in the car to enjoy an hour of summer at the pool.  It was our good fortune that the Scheullers were there to play with.  It was the perfect summer evening, the kind I dream about in January when the snow is falling and it's dark all the time.

This morning was more summer perfection.  I sat on the back porch looking at the mountains, being thankful for the early summer light, until Free woke up.  Freestone is making bacon and eggs now and we're basking in our last few hours of being a three-person family before the crowd comes back with their stories of adventure and excitement.   We miss the girls, but more than that, we need Daddy to light the fireworks tomorrow night!

Man Up and Eat the Relish

I'm not going to apologize.  I love the Tiger Mom.  I loved the irony, humor, introspection, the brazen pride along with the self-doubt in her book.  I love the intentionally shocking anecdotes and the outcry they provoked.  Can you say "marketing genius?"   And I love the Chinese philosophy.  The more I read Chua's daughter's blog, the more enamored I am of the whole family.  I've known lots and lots of Asian Americans raised the same way and they're grateful for it.  In fact, I don't know anyone who has ever talked about how strict their parents were without a note of pride in their voices, whether they were raised on a farm in rural Utah or in downtown Belgrade.  (Hi Zeljko!)  I could go on, but read this story from Sophia's blog and tell me it's not exactly why kids feel so entitled.   Plus, it's funny.

Today, Freestone said to me, "I've never won a race."  Instinctively, I was about to say, "You're still number one, Free.  You're still a winner!"  But then I caught myself and said, "You could train every day and run a race, and you might win.  That would be fun!"  You can't tell kids to feel like winners.  As much as we parents want to give our children everything, accomplishment is a feeling that has to be earned.

Supporting a Lemonade Stand: Check.

We can check off buying lemonade from neighborhood kids for the summer.  I don't have any cute pictures of the two little entrepreneurs because my neighbors might think it was creepy if they saw me taking pictures of their kids.  Not to mention posting them on the internet.  Anyway, Freestone and I were on our way to orchestra and I was trying to convince him to climb in the back and get us each a resfreshing bottle of (probably hot) water.  I was dying of thirst.  Being Freestone, he wouldn't do it, not even if it was highly against the law.  Just then, I spotted two boys waving signs.  Yesss!   And I even had a dollar!

They informed me that they were out of raspberry lemonade, but they had pink lemonade and otter pops.  I ordered two glasses of pink lemonade and handed over my dollar.  Halfway through the second cup, the boys ran out of pink lemonade.  They conferred with each other and decided to offer us a free otter pop.  Score!  With that dollar is his sweaty little hand, I could tell that the kid did not want to give me the two quarters I had coming, so I told him to keep the change.  He looked like he had hit the jackpot.

I, on the other hand, was the proud owner of a tepid, syrupy glass of sugar that I could not drink.  Freestone downed his and ate the otter pop.  When I dropped him off, I reminded him that he could get up to use the bathroom during orchestra if he had to.  He said, "No I can't, and I hate orchestra.  I'm not even good enough to even LOOK at the music."  I smiled and said, "I know.  I had to fake it for a whole year in orchestra, and I was eleven.  You're so far ahead of me!"  He staggered into the building, probably in a sugar coma, carrying a music stand, his folder and his violin.

I drove home, added two quarts of water to my cup of lemonade, poured it over ice and sat down to enjoy watching the kids build a fort out of all the pillows and blankets in the house.

Ahh, summer.

Girls' Camp at Heber Valley was restful, peaceful, fun and spiritual.  I loved being with the girls, especially my own.  The food provided was wonderful, and we didn't even have to help with it.  Heaven!!  The whole experience was precious.  I gained a lot of insight.  My favorite part was our Jesus the Christ experience.  Long before camp, our amazing camp director assigned each girl and leader a chapter to read and study from Jesus the Christ by James E. Talmage.  Parents actually complained to the leaders that the assignment was too hard!  Seriously?  One chapter of a beautiful book that is widely beloved by Latter-day Saints?  The girls didn't complain, though, and they came ready with their little chapters highlighted, some with pages of notes on their thoughts and feelings.  We broke into four study groups.  My group impressed me with their prayerful preparation and interest in the topic.  We were able to have a powerful discussion.  I'm here to tell you that the next generation is in good hands with these beautiful young women.

I have to thank Aunt Michelle and Scott for taking such good care of the kids while I was gone.  The first day, Scott took Ari, Free, Xanthe, Ptolemy and Jake to the zoo AND a movie AND the pool.  He might just be the best dad ever.  The rest of the week, Michelle kept them safe and loved making cinnamon rolls, visiting the dollar store, doing puzzles, playing in the hose, etc.  Each night, Scott took them to the pool.  He finally realizes why I love the pool in the evening so much.  It's serene.

For more on camp, Golda says it all...with pictures.

The Least of These

This is my dear friend Tiffany's story.  It is one of those times that you wish in vain that government could intersect with common sense and human decency could prevail. 

Happy Birthday, Dear Ptolemy

 It's been a quick two years!  Too quick.  I can't believe this little guy is a big guy already.  He has been a perfect child, a complete joy and a wonder for everyone.  He loves to go.  now, when Scott is getting ready in the morning, Tolly scrambles to find his shoes, then stands by the front door saying, "I'm ready-a go to a office!"  He hates being left behind, so a couple of times, Scott has taken him along for the ride.  His new thing is, "Wait for me!"  He'll probably be saying that a lot, being the youngest.  He says to me on his way out the door, "I go a wingset and play, K Mom?" 

Saturday, Scott, Golda and I took Ptolemy to get his first official haircut.  He was scared, but held it together.  After the haircut, we let him choose a balloon at Ben Franklin.  I asked him what color he wanted and he said, "A geen one."  So he came home with his very own green balloon, which he was very possessive of.  I'm not sure if the prized balloon cause more joy or more aggravation for little Tolly.

Sunday the 17th was the official birthday.  The Kings came over for a brunch of grilled salmon and caesar salad and a big chocolate cake.  Tolly's favorite part was blowing out the candles.  Coco and Bill gave him a toy that he absolutely loves.  In fact, everyone loves it!

The Dopps celebrated July birthdays with presents at the lake last week, but that didn't stop us from celebrating again with a delicious dinner and cake at Bruce and Marlene's Sunday night.  For now, the celebrations are over, but Tolly doesn't care.  He's too busy getting ready for work!

The Lake, Restorative Powers Of

My cloud of doom has been blown away and replaced with clear summer skies.  Phew!  Our Dopp Family Trip this year was planned for the cabin, but plans changed when the property surrounding the cabin fell victim to spring flooding.  Everything is fine, but nobody was looking forward to mud wrestling as a vacation activity. We decided to spend a day at Willard Bay instead, boating and picnicking, playing on the beach and bobbing in the water.  It was a huge success.  Nikki and Clint brought their boat and were kind enough to take everyone for multiple rides, tubing and water skiing.  And even though I brought drinks, snacks and watermelon, Bruce and Marlene brought tables, tablecloths, cook stoves and enough food for five days.  They effortlessly put my whining to shame by demonstrating what real adults do for their families.  I am such a wimp!  I have to admit, my hardest job at the lake was reapplying sunscreen to all my kids.  In my defense, there are a lot of them, so it was practically a full-time job.  I hardly had any time to eat three dozen cookies.

Our beautiful day ended with one last boat ride.  Scott and I were the last to leave, so we ended up going out with Nikki and Clint and their boys for a glorious tour of the lake at twilight with the mountains and clouds presenting a glowing backdrop for the shimmering water.  It was a spiritual experience.  I kept thinking, "Look at this!  Look at this world!  This is genius!"  And of course it is.  Even more moving than the view was admiring the nine kids we had with us...Austin asleep at the helm, Kiptyn brand-new to all this adventure, Cade's blonde curls blowing in the wind, and all of our kids, safely here, right where they belong.

I hope I can remember the peaceful expanse of the lake when life bears down and obscures the big picture.  All I'll have to think if I lose sight of the joy is, "The lake is still there.  All is well."

Are We Having Fun Yet?

Being a grown-up is hard work!  Sheesh!  Remember when summer was fun?  When you wandered around in the woods, dug in the dirt, swam until you got hungry?  At the first hunger pang, someone would provide you with a nice, plump hot dog or a diagonally cut tuna sandwich, along with an ice-cold drink.  And the naps!  Oh, the naps!  Cool sheets, humming air conditioners.  You didn't know then that you were experiencing bliss.

Now I know that someone has to plump those hot dogs and cut those sandwiches and bring the towels and sunscreen and keep track of everyone, and naps?  Forget it.  (Although I did lie down for three seconds today before Ptolemy toddled in and smashed a 4th of July cupcake on my leg.)  Today, my good friend brought over a giant heap of money for Golda and Ruby in exchange for babysitting her kids while she was at girls' camp.  We talked about how crazy summer has been.  I want to say I'm relaxing, but honestly, it's been intense.  We laughed because, in the frenzy of leaving her kids for two days, Jen's only instruction for Ruby was, "Isaac takes a two-hour nap."  Nothing about the other three kids.  There was no time!  And then she was out the door.   Now she's back and both of us are buying and cutting up watermelons, packing coolers, making salads, washing sleeping bags, keeping kids happy, just trying to get a day or two ahead.  Tonight I barbequed for 25 of Golda and Ruby's friends who are still here, and after this, I have to buy ice and four birthday presents for tomorrow's 7am boating excursion.  We all have to be packed for girls' camp by Saturday, and the bishop just called and asked Golda to give a talk in Sacrament meeting on Sunday.

So I said to my friend today, "Jen, are we having fun?"

My friend was brave.  She said, "No!  We're not!"  There.  Somebody said it.  Sure, barbeques and parties and camp and all those outings are what summer is about, and it's fun.  It's just that we wish, for a little while, that we could hand back all the stupid responsibilities to the grown-ups and go catch tadpoles while they pack the coolers.

I want my mommy!  And I want my tuna sandwich cut in triangles.

Three Cheers for the Red, White and Blue

Walking to the Kaysville breakfast:  Check.
Two parades:  Check
Lounging at Grandma's:  Check.
Fireworks in our usual spot:  Check
Perfect day:  Check

Someone mentioned to me that the 4th of July is the perfect holiday because it's full of traditions without the stress.  No gift giving, no month-long preparations.  I wholeheartedly agree.  I love the 4th.  
For more coverage, see Golda's blog.