As I drove off, tears sprang up and with them, images. Images of scenes I never saw, because I wasn't there. I pictured my mom at my wedding reception after I'd gone. After I'd changed into the going-away ensemble Mom and I had shopped for in San Francisco and gone, arm in arm with Scott. I could just see her turning to go in the house, helping the caterers pack up. Looking at the silent flower arrangements. Walking around the house turning off lights. Taking off her makeup, hanging up her beautiful mother-of-the-bride dress, another purchase from our trip.
I remember so many times my parents must have turned away from the excitement, going home while I forged into the future without a backward glance. It was all about me, and I must have been oblivious of the supporting cast who launched me into the world.
Now I'm back from traveling, home from college, here to stay. All of my recital programs, diplomas, report cards and wedding shower invitations are tucked away in a neat box on a high shelf. The stunning flowers from my wedding are long gone.
And here I am, irrelevant me, driving away from Golda with a cracked windshield and a loose fan belt, squeaking my way home while my daughter plows forward into independence. I used to be a lead character. Now I'm furniture. I'm the comfy rocking chair stage right. I'll just be there when you get home. *sniff...*
See? This kind of drama is exactly why they don't allow moms backstage for the pageant. We can't be trusted to keep our emotions in check! Thanks for helping Golda, Jenny. Glad it's you, not me. And so is Golda!
6 comments:
I love the picture you painted driving away... another LOL moment.
But seriously... I get what you mean. There are more and more of these moments where it is all about them and the don't even really need us around. A weird time for sure.
I loved your thoughts about the wedding. It was such a fun night. All you can eat chocolates, oh and you Scott of course. That was nice too. :)
We can't wait to see G tomorrow. She will be fantabulous!
So touching. What an interesting rule. What about girls who don't have as wide a support system? But maybe that's the point, to provide yet another way to stretch and grow.
I really liked your thoughts on the "My Way" post. While my accomplishments pale in comparison, I agree with the irony of getting more done when I seemingly have less time to do it. There's a definite magic to structure. But please, like another commenter said, give us the nitty gritty details of how yo do it all!
Give Golda my best!
Guess who the first person she is going to all when she comes in the door-you. That's what I love about being a mom.
Beautifully said Circe as always. Wishing Golda the very best. Having been there last nite when she and Jennie walked in, I know Golda will do a super fabulous job tonite. Many thanks to Jennie. You could tell she was helping Golda so much and enjoying being there for her. We will all be holding our breath tonite and saying our silent prayers. Your thoughts of your Mom brought tears. As we become older we become our moms, seeing the younger ones as we once were.Now it is your job to be your "Mom" and you are doing a wonderful job. Love you, thanks for last nite. Sarah wishes Golda the best!..Love, Tricia XO
Wishing the best for Golda. She is beautiful! Interesting post about the cycles of our life. Your mom's turn, then your's, now Golda's...and in a few years maybe her daughter's turn!
Great post! I love it.
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